A banana drink with a ray of sun and a pinch of fatigue ♥

Hallo, sugars! ⛄ 🍪 🥛 ❄️ It’s Tuesday afternoon

  • you can choose to read this or just scroll down to what was actually supposed the cute and short post I was thinking about*
here, but lately, after i finish Tuesday’s tasks, i tend to feel a little at ease as if the week was over. Anyhow, after eventually finishing the tasks so far, i went to a new shop i found out about with a pal of mine, who was actually the one with the idea and insisting that we went, but it ended up with me buying a bunch of stuff and also some more things to complete the gifts i prepared – who were whatsoever already complete, so that makes it three weeks of continuous buying and preparing for giving Christmas gifts, and yet so far, i have to admit, even brag, that this year was the most organised and the one and only Christmas so far when i am truly sure that i have perfectly matched the gifts to the persons ♥ Alrighty, these been said, finally arriving home
and this goes on with me losing myself in the bathroom in a long long therapy shower and music session – yes, i do listen to music in the bathroom and sometimes even with my headphones on, yes, i do that – and then this also goes on with me realizing that for somebody who tends to care so much for the environment and the nature and animals etc you get my point, i sometimes consume a large – too large amount of water and i have to tell myself No, Zoe, the fact you make water related donations does absolutely not compensate the fact you sometimes do overuse that tap! It’s like totally undoing the whole initial purpose! Aaaand i am done on this funny not so funny part. Oh yeah, by the way, is it funny at least? 
I am asking you because i literally get so amused myself sometimes, when i just go over some of my posts or even things i wrote in my notes and so on, over the fact that i have this thing where i just can’t seem to concentrate on one thing only, go all the way and spread through each and one little thing that comes to my mind. Because, once again, this in a nutshell post about me creating what it was supposed to be another before Christmas reminder while drinking a banana beverage, enjoying the sunny weather which happily gives me the energy i kind of lost recently, was horrifyingly transformed by, of course, the one and only ME, into a long post. SO yeah 

the reminder shall began

And this one will really be as quick as a flash and as cute as a button indeed!
Okay, now, it is one of the best feelings when we find somebody we have something in common with, because it gives us that sense of belonging, that feeling of finding a tiny piece of your soul in somebody else, the feeling of being united and being accepted and at peace and blissful and so on. Now i think we can all agree that we don’t always find this kind of bonding, unfortunately – i guess? Well, there you go, there is, as i see it, one thing we all have in common without maybe always realising it. It’s our desire to feel at peace. Nobody wants to ‘not feel ok’ and pretty much everyone dislikes that nasty feeling one gets in the depth and the most shallow part of their soul. No matter that even scientifically there was written and proven that this phenomenon called broken-hearted exists in real life. Well now, another thing we do dislike and has a great importance beside other patological diseases, is stress, as you may have already imagined. But the question would be how to prevent this from happening? 
You can’t really always use morphine now, could you? Oh – and a fun interesting fact is that morphine (behind her multiple effects) has the ability to remove the affective component of the pain, which would mean that one person would still feel the pain, but he or she would no longer be disturbed by it. Okay now i bet we all crave a little morphine. I kind of do. Jk  ☺
Now, whether you imagine out of nowhere, something as being in a certain way, just because you feel it that way and no other logical reason but your intuition and it disturbs you when people don’t take it into consideration. Whether you have been cheated and you wish you were told firstly that you did something wrong or you wish that you were treated more honest than you were and it makes you wonder if you also ever forget to be honest in some situations and this is your punishment. Whether you bought these new shoes and a hurried neighbour from across the building breaks your heel and then it’s them who get all hasty and quick tempered saying that you were in their way and making it look as it was your fault and ruins your whole day from that moment on. Whether you love Christmas and holidays in general but in the same time you kind of hate it because you never really had that one cosy warm and full of love Christmas you wished for deep down your heart and you start acting Grincher than the Grinch himself and without realising or even wanting it you start to be the mood killer of your group of people. Whether you wish you could interfere and make a different point of view in an elaborate topic but you can’t seem to find your inner voice to make your outer voice strong enough to express yourself and you remember that you were never thought that way into respecting yourself enough to truly believe you are also given the right to have a different point of view and of course, this blame would also go on you too. Whether you acted like not yourself with somebody in a certain situation and you were so ashamed but it was just a bad day or maybe a bad month and you wish you could take it back because now you two don’t talk anymore and it crashes your heart a little because maybe it was both of you or maybe just you who thought that there was a chance of good and long companionship or friendship or relationship of any kind or maybe it is just your inner blame who wishes you controlled yourself better. Whether you are in a long marriage who was never – not even in the first moments – good for you, healthy, loving or supportive and you know what to do but you are too scared and you just let yourself float like that, the despair getting stronger. Whether you are in your young adulthood and all the way you have been pushed back and forth to please everybody and now you only seem to feel pain and feel as if you were forgotten although you did everything and anything to make everyone happy, but you, but that still wasn’t enough and everybody around you acts like you only did those to please yourself and ask for more and although this was supposed to be a good start of the real adult life with full responsibilities and rewards and exciting joyful moments, you feel as if your end was making the sky upon you mash and the ground from underneath crumble.
Whether any of this is you or there is another particular story that marked you, I am sure you still have the hopeful desire of a special change this white Christmas, so hold on. It will come, sooner or later, it shall come. Remember that you did it until now so you should keep on doing it. Because you can inspire others to be as strong as you are. And as kind and patient. There is nothing more to lose. Even if there was, lose that too. Because you still have something, then, to live for. If you stil think that there is something left. If you still have that strong vibe, then you have a reason to prove wrong. And even if you don’t feel like something still exists for you – which i definitely don’t think it is true and i know deep down you don’t either – then very good – get something new, recreate yourself.
Wait a bit longer for yourself.
Take another deep breath.
Unwrap every single physical or spiritual gift you receive and now – find its use.
There is nothing that couldn’t be used by you, in any way it would bring you joy. Now, will you? ☻